Riders of scooters

To those of you riding scooters, please do not try to compensate for the innate uncoolness of your scooter by looking smug while you pass my truck that is obviously attempting to melt the ice caps while simultaneously burning the rain forest and drilling for oil in the Alaska wildlife refuge. If you feel you must compensate for you mode of transportation, try using another technique. I suggest goofy humor. Wear a sombrero, for instance. Or, if that's too dangerous, how about a one of those ties that look like a fish, and finish it off with comically oversize sunglasses? That way you can feel good about saving the planet, and I can feel good about the chuckle I get from seeing you. It's a win-win.